Just Say NO- to guilt that is

As Moms we have a hard time saying NO. We have a hard time saying no to playdates, baby sitting, visiting family that hates us or is destructive towards us, sales parties, and just about anything else anyone asks us to do. We feel guilty if our kids aren't entertained every second of every day. We feel guilty if they aren't involved in 3 sports, dance, music lessons, scouts, and tutoring. We feel guilty if we don't attend every wedding, birthday party, bar mitzah, sweet 16, baby shower, batchlorette party, sales party, meeting, and it goes on and on. Some Moms are so lucky as to work and try and cover all of the above bases.

The guilt needs to stop! If you don't have the time, it's OK to say no. If you don't have the finances, it's OK to say no. If you just need time at home, as a family, its OK to pick and choose a few events to attend, and opt out of the rest. If people hate you because you just couldn't make it, due to whatever reason, then they weren't very good friends to begin with. Good friends understand that you may be tired, broke, or just simply overwhelmed and need to rest.

It took me 4 years of Mommy-hood to learn to say no without feeling bad. It took another 2 years to be able to say it and not feel any bit of guilt. My family is important, and my time with them is important. Sometimes we just need time to stay home, rest, relax, and do things like play board games or do puzzles. Sometimes we just need to stay home and get schoolwork and housework done. We pick a few parties and events to go to, and the rest we let go.

With all the holidays coming up, take the time now and remind yourself of your priorities. Mine are to make special memories with my family. To bake cookies and decorate with a smile on my face. To sing Carols while making hot chocolate and watch old movies. Not to rush from event to event, being tired with overwhelmed kids.

Good luck on letting go of the guilt!